Yours Truly, Claire

LIFE UPDATE // WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN??

Hello again, it's been a while hasn't it. I was in two minds about making this post. Should I just continuing blogging without acknowledging that I've been away for over a month? I thought not. So I just thought I'd make a little update, tell you what's been going on and why I've been so absent.

So the big thing that happened to me recently is that I moved back to university. I'm now in a lovely student house with a bunch of my friends and I'm really loving it. Even though I'm a second year now I still took part in 'Freshers Week' which has left bruised and battered. I caught freshers flu (not a myth) and was seriously ill for three day. I'm pretty sure drinking alcohol for seven days straight would make anyone sick but I soldiered through and managed to go most nights.

Another big factor to my lack of posting has to be my job. I've been given a lot more hours at work and it's taken me a while to be able to balance everything out. I've got more responsibilities and duties to carry out but I do love a challenge.

The last thing I wanted to touch on briefly is around the topic of mental health. I find it really awkward to talk about my own mental to health people but I'm just gonna go for it. For the first few weeks of moving back to university I was on my own. My other housemates didn't move in till a lot later than me. When I planned to move back I didn't even think that I wouldn't be okay living on my own, I was excited. I was finally having that independence that I wanted. But once I got to my new place I soon realised that I wasn't as confident about living on my own as I made myself believe. I started panicking and becoming fearful of absoloutly everything. When I become scared I can't face the thing that scares me. For instance I became scared of the kitchen in my house (i know it sounds nuts) so I just stopped going in there. I just ate in my room for like four days straight and got crappy take always. Why was I scared of my kitchen? I don't know but it's all I could think about. Luckily I have some pretty awesome friends that helped me through that weird state. I'm feeling a lot better now but I'm so scared that I'll never be able to live on my own. Why can't my brain just be normal????

So yeah that's about it really. I am determined to post at least twice a week on here but if it doesn't happen it doesn't happen. Hope everyone is well and having a good day.

I'll write soon xox

September 26, 2016
1 Comments

TEA TREE & WITCH HAZEL NOSE STRIPS

beauty

Hello guys!

I am always up for trying new products to help improve my skin. So whilst I was shopping in Boots the other day I thought I'd try out a few new ones. I was pleasantly surprised to see that Boots actually had a skin care promotion on where if you spent over 5 pound on skincare you got a free Garnier Micellar Cleaning Water which I am still yet to use on my skin.

But today I'm actually going to be reviewing a different product which is the Tea Tree & Witch Hazel Two in One Nose Strips. Boots also had ANOTHER promotion on the Tea Tree & Witch Hazel products so I was able to also get a free Peel Off Face Mask which I've used before and fell in love with.

Bit of a weird little side story but when I was younger I used to get very very self conscious about getting little spots and bumps on my nose. To the point where one day I actually got a nail file and tried to file off the bumps. This is one of the DUMBEST things I've ever done. It didn't work at all, it just made my nose incredibly sore and red. But now I'm a little bit more educated on skin care I like to use noes strips.

I've used nose strips plenty of times before but never this particular brand. I was intrigued by this product because it contains active charcoal which is something I haven't used before. The charcoal helps to remove bacteria and oil from the skin. Each treatment comes with one blackhead removal strip and one after treatment strip.

So firstly I washed my face to make sure its clean and fresh before the treatment. I then dried my face apart from my nose as this makes it easier to apply the strip. I then placed the black head removing strip on my nose, patted it down and left it there for about 15 minutes. The strip dried and slightly hardened onto my nose. After the 15 minutes I then removed it. I am such a wimp when it comes to pain but I find it's best to take it off all at once rather then to slowly peel it off. I could instantly see the results on the strip (ew) and on my nose as it felt and looked so much smoother.

Onto the second part of the treatment which is the 'seal & calm' nose strips. This strip contains tea tree oil and witch hazel which is very soothing and helps to tighten up pores. Before applying the strip to my nose, I gave my face a quick cleanse with a cleansing wipe. I left the strip on my nose for around 30 minutes. After removing the strip (which was much easier then the first one) my nose felt incredibly moisturised but without feeling sticky or slimy. To get the full effects of this treatment I believe you're meant to do it once or twice a week.

I'm definitely going to be doing this treatment again because it actually works. The results are instant and it's a lot cheaper than some of the other brands I've used. The only thing I found difficult about this was removing the blackhead strip because it did hurt a tiny bit.

I'll write soon xox

August 27, 2016
1 Comments

JULY FAVOURITES

beauty

Hello again! I know we’re well into August (15 days till my birthday woo) but I thought I’d do a late July favourites post. This is my first favourites post on this blog so there are going to be a few products that I’ve used for a while but I especially loved using in July.

JOHN FRIEDA FRIZZ EASE MIRACULOUS RECOVERY

I usually don't use that many John Frieda products but this deep conditioner has worked for wonders for my hair and extensions. Since the weather has been so great my hair has been getting really brittle and dried out. Although I'm trying to cut down on how much heat I use on my hair, I also blow dry and straighten my hair and extensions quite a lot. This deep conditioner has really helped my hair to recover from heat damage and it's given it a nice shine. I've used it so much I've almost finished the pot!

7th HEAVEN VERY BERRY MUD MASQUE

Although I usually go peel-off face masks because they're easier to remove, I have been loving this mud mask. Not only does it smell amazing, it does wonders for my skin because it's packed with antioxidants! I only use this on my face occasionally but when I do I can really tell the difference. Also, these products are 'leaping bunny' certified.

KISS LIGHT REFLECTING PRIMER

I've wasn't aware that Wilkos had a beauty range till I started working at one of their stores last year. I picked up this primer because it looked so pretty but I wasn't expecting much of it. Surprisingly, it's works a treat as base for my make up. It's also really cheap and I've re-purchased this a few times. So glad I found this gem!

BAYLIS & HARDING MIDNIGHT FIG & POMEGRANATE BODY BUTTER

I got this as a Christmas present last year and I've been using it a lot recently. To me this body butter smells really sweet and creamy. I know it's kind of odd to describe a smell as creamy but if you've used this product before you'll understand. It leaves me skin feeling so soft and it's lasted me or ages so I haven't had to re-purchase.

DENIM SKIRT - BOOHOO

I've had this skirt for a while now and I annoyingly can't find the exact link for it on the website but they do have lots of similar ones. I've worn this skirt so much throughout July because of the sunny weather. I've worn it to work, evenings out with friends and just for a casual look. I find it really pulls my outfits together and goes perfectly with a nice crop top.

It's crazy how quickly July went. I've got lots planned for August including my birthday, getting stuff ready to move back to university and plenty of interesting blog posts.

I'll write soon xox

August 12, 2016
5 Comments

Five Healthy-ish Snack Ideas

dairy free

Hello again! My blogging schedule has become really sporadic because of work commitments but I am back!

I try to maintain somewhat of a healthy balanced diet but sometimes it can be difficult. Pigging out and watching a bunch of films on the sofa is something I try not to do too often, but it is a great for days when you haven’t got much to do. I find that if I try to eat several small meals a day I am less likely to snack in between them, compared to eating three large meals a day. However, if I’m busy and on the go, a healthy snack can really fill a gap. So here five healthyish snack ideas that are quick and easy.

Just a little note, I am in no way a dietician, nutritionist or health expert. These are just some foods that I like to snack on that I don’t think are particularly unhealthy.

Popcorn

I love popcorn. I usually prefer salted popcorn but if I don’t have another choice I will go for sweet. The brand I usually purchase from is the Metcalfe Skinny Popcorn. This brand is all about healthy snacking and does a range of products. It’s also suitable for vegetarians and gluten free which is great for me as I am meant to avoid gluten as much as possible. I also love this brand because they do a lot of charity work through the sale of their products.

Hummus & Breadsticks

I know some people don’t like hummus but I absolutely love it! You can have it with crackers, fruit or veggies but I prefer to have it with breadsticks. There are many different types of hummus you can get but my favourite is Moroccan hummus. I’ve heard it’s pretty easy to make your own hummus but I’m a little bit lazy so I just purchase it from a store.

Cashew Nuts

Unlike both siblings I don’t have a nut allergy, which is kind of strange. I find salted cashew nuts so moreish, I can easily go through a whole bag of them. Cashew nuts are a good source of protein and are rich in vitamins & minerals that help maintain the immune system. They’re pretty cheap to buy and can be found in most supermarkets and corner shops.

Frozen Yoghurt

There’s a lot of debates discussing if ‘fro yo’ is actually healthier than ice cream but I believe that it is and I prefer the taste of frozen yoghurt to ice cream. I did have to do a little bit of searching but there are plenty of dairy free frozen yoghurts in supermarkets and online. My favourite is the Raspberry flavour from the ‘Coconut Collaborative’ brand. They use coconut milk as an alternative to dairy and it tastes amazing!

Sunflower Seeds

This might be a bit of an odd one but I really do enjoy snacking on sunflower seeds. I was actually babysitting at the time I discovered this snack. I was looking after a little girl and she wanted to share her sunflower seeds with me. At first I was bit sceptical because they’re seeds, can you even eat them? But once I tried them I realised they’re actually quite nice and learnt that they’re full of good vitamins and minerals!

Let me know if you guys have any healthy snacking ideas! Hope you enjoyed reading this and you're all having a fab summer!

I'll write soon xox

August 10, 2016
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Controlling Relationships

advice

It’s so good to be back and writing my blog again. The past week I’ve been working a lot of overtime so I haven’t had much time to sit down and write and I didn’t want to give you guys and rushed post. But I have a few days off work so I can relax and write to my heart’s content!

This post is going a little bit longer and more serious as it’s about a past relationship of mine. I reflect a lot on negative experiences as I see it as a way to learn, grow and avoid making the same mistakes again. At the time I couldn’t clearly see the situation I was in but now I am fully aware that what I went through was a controlling relationship. I’m not going to say it was abusive because I didn’t and still don’t feel like I was abused, but definitely controlled to some extent.

I’m not going to mention names for obvious reasons so we’ll call this guy X. Me and X met through a mutual friend after hanging out a few times. I hadn’t had a proper serious relationship before so I guess you could say I was a little naïve. We met up and hung out together a few times and before deciding to start a relationship. At the time things at home weren’t great for me and my relationship with my parents was rocky. So I thought being in a relationship would be a great way to distract myself from my home problems, it would also give me someone to confide in. For the first few months things were amazing, I met his parents, walked his dog, and even spent Christmas together.

At the time I was attending college and studying A Levels. I don’t regret taking A Levels but I regret putting so much pressure on myself because it didn’t help my anxiety at all. I was also battling a lot of negative thoughts towards myself and I was stupidly self-harming which can be so horrifically addicting even though it’s so awful to do to yourself. X told me that I shouldn’t be feeling or doing this because there’s always someone who has it worse than you. Which is totally true but it didn’t mean that my feelings and thoughts were irrelevant. This carried on for a little bit and then things got a lot worse.

At college I was making a lot of new friends which really helped me to come out of my shell. I got invited to a party by this girl on my course and I was really excited to go. However because of my anxiety the thought of meeting a bunch of new people completely petrified me. I told X about the party and he said I shouldn’t go at first. He told me it wasn’t good for my anxiety but I was determined to go and not let my anxiety rule my life. I remember that he texted me saying that whilst I was at the party I had to ring him every fifteen minutes so he knew I was okay. I thought he was just being caring and genuinely wanted to know if I was alright. For the first few hours of the party I did ring him, I was fine at the time and he seemed okay with me being there. But as my anxiety kicked in I started to drink more alcohol to ‘relax’ me. X kept texting me and asking why I wasn’t ringing him. I didn’t want to ring him. I was enjoying myself (probably because of the alcohol) and I felt like he was suffocating me a bit. So I texted him saying that my phone was dying and I couldn’t reply. Stupidly I drank way too much and ended up passing out. Alcohol really isn’t the answer to anxiety and I have no idea why I thought it was back then.

The next morning I woke up too an awful headache and ridiculous amount of missed calls and texts from X. He was so angry at me because I didn’t ring me. He told me I was a ‘common chav’ for drinking alcohol and that I didn’t deserve him. I was so confused, I hadn’t done anything wrong. Why didn’t he trust me?

Things got a lot worse. X started demanding that I tell him where I was at all times and who I was with. He even turned up at my college (which he didn’t attend) just to see what I was doing and who I was with. If I didn’t ring him when he wanted me to, he would threaten to kill himself. He didn’t force me to do anything with him in a sexual way but there was some stuff that looking back at I really wasn’t comfortable doing. I’m not gonna go into a lot of detail but guilt tripping someone into doing ‘stuff’ with you is completely wrong. He’d call me in the night threatening to kill himself and telling me that I didn’t love him and that it’s my fault that he was depressed. Bearing in mind whilst this was going on I was revising for my A Level exams and my own mental health wasn’t great at the time. He made me feel like I was the cause for everything wrong that was happening to us both.

This went on in total for a whole year. A whole year I thought this was completely normal and I was the problem. I used to have a horrible fear of being on my own. I thought I needed him and that I wouldn’t cope without him. To this day I am still learning how to be content with just myself. It wasn’t until results day that I finally snapped and realised. I hadn’t really told anyone about the situation with myself and X so nobody knew what I was going through. I opened my results envelope and my heart sank. I got a U. I got a U in one of my favourite subjects. The night before I sat that exam, I’d been on the phone to X trying to convince him not to kill himself. He said that if I hung up on him he was going to kill himself so I didn’t actually get any sleep or revision done that night, resulting in me getting a U in the exam.

I mustered up the courage to end it with X after getting my exam results. It might sound cowardly but I did text him saying it was over. I couldn’t face him, I knew that if I saw him he’d guilt me into staying with him. Even when I was breaking up with him I still felt guilty, what if he really did try to take his own life? How could I live with myself if he did? He didn’t take it well, he wanted me to give him back all the presents (1 necklace) he’d given me, he said I shouldn’t be with anyone because I’d make them ‘get depression’. He still messaged me on and off for a while, telling me about his new relationships and how ‘happy’ he was without me.

What the hell was I thinking putting up with this bollocks for a whole year? It baffles me to this day how I didn’t see how wrong the relationship was. Just because I feared being on my own I put up with such a controlling person. I’m so thankful for my friends from school and college for really helping me pull through a not nice time in my life. If anyone feels like they’re being abused or controlled by their boyfriend or girlfriend you must end the relationship. This is not love. This now how a relationship should be. I was a young naïve teenager at the time but this can happen at any age and it can get out of hand so quickly. It’s always good to talk about your feelings and anxieties with people you trust. If someone truly loves you, they won’t bring you don’t, control you or make you feel like your life isn’t worth living without them.

Right now I am single and I am very, very happy. Although I have my bad days, my mental health has improved, my relationship with my parents is much better and I have an amazing group of friends. I am learning to love and being content with myself. It hard sometimes because it is nice to have someone who loves and cares about you, but being happy with yourself is more important than being in a bad relationship just to feel like you’re ‘cared’ for. I don’t know if any of this make sense but what I’m saying is LOVE YOURSELF!

Sorry that this was so long and it might have been a little bit boring but I think this topic is very important. Both boys and girls can fall victim to abusive relationships and I think it needs to be spoken about a lot more. I promise my next post will be a lot more cheerful and positive!

I’ll write soon xox

August 08, 2016
4 Comments

GLITTERY SEA NAILS

beauty

GLITTERY SEA NAILS

Bonjour! This week seems to be flying by. I finally got a few days off work so I was able to have a pamper evening and my favourite part is doing my nails. I’ve worn this nail look for a while now and I think it perfect for the summer season. It’s pretty basic and fairly easy to do, and you only need three products. I call the look ‘glittery sea nails’ (so inventive) because it the shade of blue reminds me of the ocean!

I first start by removing any old nail varnish on my nails and giving them a quick file. I’m always chipping and breaking my nails at work so I try my best to keep them looking neat by filing them.

Revlon Nail Care Multi Care Base and Top Coat

I really love this product as it can be used for both the base and top coat. It gives my nails a really sleek look and it protects them from staining. I put a coat of this before I apply nail polish and glitter. I also use it afterwards to give it a smooth finishing shine.

Rimmel Salon Pro By Kate Nail Polish (Brit Pop/Nymph)

This colour absolutely perfect for the summer as it gives a beautifully deep bluey/green finish. This is part of the Kate Moss collection. The formula contains Lycra which helps to prevent the polish from chipping and fading. I also love the brush applicator for this product as it’s thick, sturdy and wide. On my bottle it’s labelled with the colour Brit Pop. However when I looked online it was called Nymph. I’m not entirely sure why the same product has two different names but I’m gonna carry on calling it Brit Pop.

Ciate Neon Glitter

Now this is what gives my nails the sea like shimmer effect. I use the colour ‘Foam Party’ because it matches well with the nail polish. I apply this to my nails whilst they are still wet with polish by tapping a bit of the glitter onto a cotton pad and gently pressing it into the glitter. If I’m going on a night out I sometimes apply the glitter to all of my nails but today I applied it to my index and ring fingers. I have used this product without applying a top coat and glitter still stayed on for a good amount of time.

I love wearing this nail look during the summer because it’s so eye catching. I’m yet to experiment with nail gems but I think I may add them to this nail look in the future. I hope you enjoyed reading this and let me know of any nail products you recommend.